Plus Sized Women with Average Sized Men

I'm plus sized my husband is not. Last week a ‘fitness trainer’ wanna-be model wrote that he and his friends laugh at men who have partners that are bigger than them. This really hit home for me and hurt more than I wish it did. My husband is 150 pounds. I will never be 150 pounds again. Even when we met when I was a size 7, I was 144. I was also 19 and didn’t have 2 kids and a connective tissue disease. My husband, bless him, has never said a word about my weight gain over the years. He fell in love with my ass at 144 pounds and still tells me he loves it daily, 31 years and 70 pounds later. He still lets me know he wants me. He still makes me feel desired. He still compliments … [Read more...]

Fat Shamers Not Welcome Here

More Fat Shamers Show Their Colors If you didn’t hear all of the commotion yesterday, there was a little backlash to the Cosmopolitan UK cover with plus-sized supermodel Tess Holliday on the cover. Some fitness trainer/wannabe model suggested that people unfriend him if they find that attractive. The nasty responses from people who agreed with him were absolutely horrifying. Yes, Tess put herself out there knowing there would be backlash and not caring, in fact, that’s WHY she did it. Tess Holliday has been an outspoken advocate for body confidence since she created the #effyourbeautystandards campaign on Instagram. She said she created the popular hashtag “out of frustration” and to … [Read more...]

I Hate My Body

It’s not cool. It’s not new. It’s not politically correct. And it can’t be overcome by just saying “stop!” I hate my body so much it affects every aspect of my life. I'm not "curvy", I'm fat. I can't embrace my "curves". When I was curvy (and I was--I had an hourglass figure before kids, now I am an apple) I did embrace it. Sure, I had a big butt, and some mean girls would let me know, but the guys liked it. I wasn't one of those girls like my son's ex who talks about how much she hates herself while she has pictures in a bikini all over Facebook. I always had a bit of a struggle with my weight, but as I've gotten older, weight won...and I have basically given up. Otherwise, I love my … [Read more...]

We Are Who We Are Guest Post by Melissa Collins

Guest post from Author Melissa Collins: I recently saw a Facebook post from one of my long-time friends who wrote that her six-year-old daughter came home from school one day complaining that she was “fat.” Now, I had only just had lunch with my friend and her daughter over the holiday break and I can one-thousand percent testify to the fact that her daughter is most definitely not fat.  She is intelligent and creative, shy but inquisitive – in short, she’s pretty much a dream come true. But even if she was “fat”, would her “fatness” negate all of those things. Does being “fat” make you less intelligent? Less important? Less worthy of love? No, it doesn’t, but somewhere along the way, … [Read more...]

The Fucking C-Section Shelf Pooch

It's all their faults, the fuckers. 2 C-sections. Now I have this THING. Granted, I'm on the fat side. But it's so concentrated in my lower belly above my scar it's strange looking! (That is NOT my belly...mine is bigger) What is this gigantic thing hanging from my body? Before kids I had a butt, but my waist was ridiculously small and I had no tummy. My mom used to have to take in my jeans at the waist. My whole family has big butts and small waists and chests. Then I got pregnant and gained 65 points with my first kid (I actually came out of the hospital weighing more than when I went in to give birth and never took a pound off). Every pound was in my stomach. For years, people … [Read more...]

Chubby Women with Skinny Men

My husband is all lean muscle. All 150 pounds that he struggles to keep on his 5'10.5" frame. He struggles to gain weight! I want to just say a big fuck you to him, but then again, I love every inch of his body. And, yeah, he is big where it counts. When we met, I was average sized, about a size 8. He was even skinnier than me then. As the years have gone by, we have both put on weight. His is 20 pounds of muscle. Mine is 75 pounds of fat. He forgets to eat!!! Who does that? I have NEVER forgotten to eat! I could be stuffed to the gills, but I'm still thinking about what I should eat next. He doesn't really snack, I can find something to snack on all day (and I do). Part of me would … [Read more...]

No Photographs Please

When I am gone, my kids will have so few photos of me. I HATE myself in photos. I have a few good ones, but I avoid the camera like the plague. I have a GAZILLION photos and videos of my kids. Hard drives filled with them. With both kids being performers now, I have filmed EVERY performance, sometimes in triplicate. But me??? Out of the 30,000 photos in my iPhoto library from the past few years, I would say I'm in 25. Book Bash was last week. As I met the authors, they asked if I wanted to be in photos with them. I responded once, "It's not about me, it's about you guys", which is true. But really, I didn't want to ruin my one chance at a photo of my idols with my double chin. I know … [Read more...]