I Hate My Body

It’s not cool. It’s not new. It’s not politically correct. And it can’t be overcome by just saying “stop!” I hate my body so much it affects every aspect of my life. I'm not "curvy", I'm fat. I can't embrace my "curves". When I was curvy (and I was--I had an hourglass figure before kids, now I am an apple) I did embrace it. Sure, I had a big butt, and some mean girls would let me know, but the guys liked it. I wasn't one of those girls like my son's ex who talks about how much she hates herself while she has pictures in a bikini all over Facebook. I always had a bit of a struggle with my weight, but as I've gotten older, weight won...and I have basically given up. Otherwise, I love my … [Read more...]

Crash Diet or Lifestyle Change?

I'm good at crash dieting. If I can lose 20-30 pounds in a month I'm all over that shit. Unfortunately I usually make it for about 5 weeks, lost that 30 pounds, then stuff my face and gain it back plus 10 pounds for my trouble. I do this about once a year. Those extra 10 pounds a year for years makes for a very big girl. 19 years ago, I lost 43 pounds on Weight Watchers and kept most of it off for 2 years till I got pregnant. To lose that weight I was obsessive. And I ended up way too skinny to maintain. I worked out twice a day. I didn't have kids yet, so counting exchanges (the program back then was before points) was kind of fun. I liked the puzzle every day of how I would divide my … [Read more...]

Guest Post: Forever Fluffy by Kari

Forever Fluffy… To hear my sister tell it – I’ve never been fat.  “You’re just fluffy” she says. I’ve struggled with my weight for as long as I can remember.  I’ve ranged from a size 12 to a size 26.  During my younger years it was hard.  I was teased by kids in school, criticized by teachers, and had meals withheld by adults who felt I was “fat enough”.  In high school, I was ignored by almost all the boys that I had crushes on, called out by a dance teacher in an incredibly public way that caused me to stop dancing – even though I’d been doing it since I was 7 and loved it.  I cannot even tell you how many times I’ve been told the dreaded “you have such a pretty face, if only you’d … [Read more...]

Another Monday and I’m Eating Chocolate

Motivation? What motivation? I'm too busy to deal with the focus it takes to diet. Once again, the excuses are mounting. First, it was 3 weeks of non-stop up-all night prepping for Wicked Book GNO, then we were busy with the kids the next week, last week I didn't bother, because I knew I wouldn't stick to any diet. So once again, I'm paying for Weight Watchers and not going. Now I'm prepping to leave town for 2 weeks, following my teenage son on tour with the School of Rock Allstars, camping at a hippy festival (Gathering of the Vibes) then going to Washington DC for a few days of tourist fun. Honestly, right now I just don't give a fuck. I am what I am, and I don't have the time, … [Read more...]

Monday Motivation: Guest post- Joanne, 150 pound loser!

Howdy from Florida everyone, Former, but forever, fat girl here. My name is Joanne and I lost 157 lbs., which took 3 years (it’s been 5 years since the start of this journey).…I have since gained 17 lbs. of it back, so I’m in panic mode…so I guess now I say I lost 140 lbs.….we all know how easy it is to gain and how quickly it can spiral out of control.  I’ve been working like a whore trying to lose it. It is not easy and it’s not working.  The older you get the harder it is.  I am going back to the start to try and get on track. Here’s what I did. 1)     Went to the doctor – you have to make sure the heart can handle what you are about to do to it 2)    I went to the nutritionist – … [Read more...]