I'm good at crash dieting. If I can lose 20-30 pounds in a month I'm all over that shit. Unfortunately I usually make it for about 5 weeks, lost that 30 pounds, then stuff my face and gain it back plus 10 pounds for my trouble. I do this about once a year. Those extra 10 pounds a year for years makes for a very big girl. 19 years ago, I lost 43 pounds on Weight Watchers and kept most of it off for 2 years till I got pregnant. To lose that ... Read the Post...
Really and Truly….Starting on Monday
I got a treadmill for Christmas! It's been in my room, all set up since last Friday, over a week ago. I haven't used it yet. I was still on vacation. Not to mention the awful cold I've had. Today though, it's Monday. The first Monday of the New Year! New habits I'm adopting: (small changes!) WATER WATER WATER!!!! ?I suck at drinking water. I need to set an alarm to make me drink! 15 minutes on the treadmill a day for now (let's not push ... Read the Post...
Going Overboard for the Holidays
My husband grew up going overboard for the holidays. His parents would go broke and into debt for Christmas, and my guy is no different. I LOVE Christmas. Since I'm Jewish, I didn't grow up with it, so I tend to overcompensate now. My 12 foot tree, and a house filled with decorations are one part, be we also tend to go crazy with gifts. I say we, but it's not really we. It's HIM. 12 foot tree not withstanding, I tend to be the more practical one. ... Read the Post...
Real Christmas Tree vs. Fake Tree?
Maybe because I didn't grow up with Christmas. Maybe it's because I like them huge, but to me it's a no-brainer. I love going and picking out a tree at the tree tents. It is stupidly stressful because if I'm spending between $150 and $200 on a tree, it better be fucking perfect. The asshats at Home Depot (which has the cheapest big trees by far) never know when they are getting new ones in, and don't even bother calling first, you can't get a ... Read the Post...
Celebrating the holidays as a mixed religion family
My kids are pizza bagels. Half Jewish and half Italian (Catholic), they are brought up with the traditions of both religions. ?My husband was brought up to go into debt every Christmas and that Santa gets the kids everything on their list. Unfortunately, that traditions has continued here. (More on that tomorrow.) I have always loved Christmas. I'm Jewish, and was not brought up with a Hanukkah bush or anything like that. We had a menorah. ... Read the Post...
Guest Post: Diet Cheating by Beth Waters
Diet Cheating We?ve all done it. We?ve all started a diet and before the first week is complete we give ourselves a reason to eat that piece of cake at the birthday party, or to get fries instead of a salad. Sure, that?s fine if you want to be on the downward spiral to weight gain, not weight loss. So since we all cheat while on diets, why do we do it? Little did you know, cheating on a diet is actually great for your diet. What!? Did I just say ... Read the Post...
The Second Time is Never the Charm
Have you ever noticed that no matter how well you do on a diet, the second time on the same program is way harder? I have done well on several diets, Weight Watchers (years ago, before points), Smart for Life Cookie Diet, HCG.... but the second time I never last more that 3-4 weeks. In the beginning, it's new and exciting, and you are all hung-ho, buying every bit of crap they sell to help complete your goal. Emptying out your cabinets. Buying ... Read the Post...
She Deserves the Egging
I'm not advocating egging or toilet papering someone's house on Halloween, but if anyone deserves it, it's the bitch who hands out this note instead of candy, a toy, pretzels, or even nothing on Halloween. FUCK HER. It takes a village my ass. Butt out of Halloween, whore! Geez, it is one day a year, let the kids get their candy in a tradition that's been around since she was a kid. I bet she didn't even need to wear that witch costume. ... Read the Post...
Actually Starting on Monday (Never Really Happens)
I have absolutely no motivation. This is ridiculous. I look in the mirror and I'm sickened about what I see, yet I don't do a damn thing about it! There is always a reason for me to "Start on Monday". I am by far the heaviest I've ever been. I gain weight preparing for a diet that never comes. So I decide to shove everything in my face like it's the last meal ever because I'm 'starting on Monday'. I just got back from vacation. I ate so ... Read the Post...
When Your Teen is Smarter Than You
I'm not stupid. I graduated college with a 3.98. But that was a LONG time ago. All that knowledge has disappeared into a cloud of pot smoke. Seriously, when I substitute teach, I won't even teach 6th grade math. Ugh, math. I hated it then, I hate it even more now. I may know more about life than my son, but I have to admit, he knows more about a LOT of stuff compared to me. He is in 11th grade and taking 3 AP courses (he has already taken two) ... Read the Post...
Making Me Clean
Starting on Monday is my motto with everything, not just dieting. I'm the queen of procrastination. I work way better under pressure, which is why I tend to write best after midnight when I want my post up the next morning. I'm also a bit of a slob and a pack rat. I have a cleaning lady once a week, and she just shoves my stuff wherever she can so she can clean beneath it. My bathroom counter is full. But I can't clean that up until I make ... Read the Post...
Spanx to the rescue?
I'm not sure if it's Spanx to the rescue or I need a rescue from my Spanx! My kids were playing (they're in a band) at a safari themed fundraiser the other night. It was at a fancy golf and country club, so I knew I had to dress up. Sadly, I looked in my ridiculously-overfilled-with-clothes-I-don't-wear walk-in closet and I don't own one single thing with animal print. (90% of my closet is black, grey or purple) So I went with one of my standby ... Read the Post...
Guest Post by R.L. Griffin: My Fat Pants Are Too Tight!
Guest Post by Author R.L. Griffin My weight is something I've thought about every single day of my life since I was 13. Although I'm excited to do this guest post, it pisses me off, because I wish I didn't have to think about my weight. ?I wish that I didn't have to exercise to stay the same weight, but I do, so that's reality. ?I've always been a well rounded body type. ?I competed in gymnastics from the time I was 6 until the 6th grade. ?I ... Read the Post...
Guest Post: Dieting and Gas…WTF?
? <standing up> Hi. I?m Lisa and I love food. I?m also overweight-by a lot. I have dieted a bazillion times which means I have tried every one of those fucking things.??I?m what you call an Oprah. That?s right. My weight goes in and out and up and down like a bad accordion. One minute I?m thin, the next minute I?m bloated, can?t see my cankles, and I?ve grown a double back with a matching double chin.??My ass and stomach are the same in ... Read the Post...
The Fucking C-Section Shelf Pooch
It's all their faults, the fuckers. 2 C-sections. Now I have this THING. Granted, I'm on the fat side. But it's so concentrated in my lower belly above my scar it's strange looking! (That is NOT my belly...mine is bigger) What is this gigantic thing hanging from my body? Before kids I had a butt, but my waist was ridiculously small and I had no tummy. My mom used to have to take in my jeans at the waist. My whole family has big butts and ... Read the Post...
Weight Debate: Nature vs. Nurture
I have two boys. One is 16, 5'10.5" and 125 pounds soaking wet. The other is a third grader, born chubby, and still is. Now if you look at mom and dad, you see the difference as well. Dad is all muscle, without an ounce of fat. He has to try to stay at 150, but often dips below (fucker). Me...lets just say I weigh a lot more. My husband and oldest son LOVE junk food, and my teen eats it non-stop. My husband just forgets to eat. (WTF? Who ... Read the Post...
Chubby Women with Skinny Men
My husband is all lean muscle. All 150 pounds that he struggles to keep on his 5'10.5" frame. He struggles to gain weight! I want to just say a big fuck you to him, but then again, I love every inch of his body. And, yeah, he is big where it counts. When we met, I was average sized, about a size 8. He was even skinnier than me then. As the years have gone by, we have both put on weight. His is 20 pounds of muscle. Mine is 75 pounds of fat. He ... Read the Post...
Guest Post: Forever Fluffy by Kari
Forever Fluffy? To hear my sister tell it ? I?ve never been fat.? ?You?re just fluffy? she says. I?ve struggled with my weight for as long as I can remember.? I?ve ranged from a size 12 to a size 26.? During my younger years it was hard.? I was teased by kids in school, criticized by teachers, and had meals withheld by adults who felt I was ?fat enough?.? In high school, I was ignored by almost all the boys that I had crushes on, called out ... Read the Post...
WTF happened to Summer?
I had such plans....I was going to do so much with the kids this summer since they only had 4 weeks of camp and 2 weeks away. That left 4 whole weeks of NOTHING. Museums, zoos, water parks, movies, the trampoline place....all the places I planned on taking them, and....didn't. At first, I was so busy planning for Wicked Book GNO, then I was getting ready for our trip, then I was catching up from our trip and planning the next Wicked Book ... Read the Post...
Vacation from Vacation
Getting back from vacation...that's when the shit hits the fan. Between catching up with missed work, laundry, 7,000 e-mails and more you wonder if it was worth it. In my case it was. But now... I am completely and totally wrecked. Exhausted.?2 weeks of non-stop action has me laid up. We went up north to drop my son off in New Jersey to rehearse for 3 days for a mini tour with shows in New York City, Philadelphia, and Gathering of the Vibes, a ... Read the Post...
